Sabrina C.

Friday, January 2, 2015

❝Dear Erin Chapter 8: Post Graduation Blues❞

Dear Erin. is something I came up with when I was lazing around dreaming of everything under the sky. You know, we all have that moment where you sit, gaze into space and let your brain wonder to catch whatever ideas there are in the air?

I've always wanted kids. And from time to time, I would name them. For the time being, my daughter is going to be called Erin. That should explain this whole new *segment*. I hope you enjoy it as much as TOTD. No promises that I'll be continuing it. See how I feel Lah.

Dear Erin,

It's the beginning of January 2015. I graduated in early August, a good 5 months ago.

Month 1
I went to travel.
I spent it with people that was close to heart and that I loved dearly.
I witnessed new things and new food.
I documented the entire thing and whenever I feel a little down,
I watch the videos again to remind myself of how privileged I am.

It was also the month of the pageant.
I was taught really important life lessons that I will always carry with me.
I had my heart broken with disappointment and frustration,
but I also had it rebirth with the love from the friendships I gained .

Month 2
I spent a good one week back with the whole family.
It was the longest I ever spent with them after 2 years.
It was weird, I had to readjust to everyone's' personalities again.
and we fought, oh WE FOUGHT!
But as usual. we got out in one piece.

While my friends were starting to look for jobs,
I decided that I wanted to be a flight attendant.
I went for my first interview and I met an amazing group of people from all around the world.
We came out of the interview, some with jobs, others not so lucky
But we all shared a great experience that we would recall during our many meet ups.

Month 3
I was certain on being a flight attendant
While waiting for open days, I kept myself busy with other work
I had so much fun with all the job opportunities and once again reminded myself of how lucky I was.

Financially, I felt independent.
It had been 3 months since I had asked for any financial assistance.

Month 4
By now most of my friends had jobs.
My hopes on being a flight attendant however, was slowly diminishing.
Not only was I jobless, I had no idea what I wanted to do.

I also turned 23.
I felt really helpless and lost.
It made me feel insecure and had me questioning who I was and my passions all over again.

Month 5
I tried out to fly one last time.
I took notes from all my other interviews to make sure I did nothing wrong.
I still did not make it. I took it at a sign. Maybe this was not meant for me after all.

Thus I started job hunting.
I did not know what I wanted to do. I basically applied for anything and everything that seemed to spark my interest.
It says on my jobstreet account that I applied for 263 positions.
I spent a good 2 weeks attending interviews everyday.
It was hard staying on point daily when I did not even have a clear vision of what my goal was.
I had moments where I felt entirely helpless and with no direction.
This is where good friends became my saving grace,

But throughout my interviews I met so many personalities.
Some questioned my purpose and had me thinking about my future.
While other really inspired me
I met good people

And slowly, I dont know how,
I found my way.
I did not have a game plan,
but life somehow just directed me naturally.

And I have a job now.
It's not just some random offer that I accepted.
I adore my soon-to-be boss
And I can't wait to start my first day.

Dear Erin,

Some doors will open but many will close.
And they were doors that you were a thousand percent sure that would be open.
And you might never know why they closed

But what I've learned from this is that you make do.
You carry on with life.
Do not halt.

What I did not realize was that in my moment of confusion
I had everything that I needed
And so do you

It might feel pointless to keep going.
Your brain might be telling you to pause everything while you get your sh*t together
But keep moving darling

Let life take its course
Let life live

Love,
Sabrina

Labels: Dear Erin

1 lovely comments ✿

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Sabrina.
Miss World Malaysia 2014 Finalist
Commercial & Advertorial Talent
Blogger // Creative Pony

Hi :)
I'm Sabrina. I've been blogging for 11 years now. That makes me sound old but I'm not. Really

I love to travel, find good bargains and watch Modern Family
I have 8 ankles and can talk dog

Please do check out my portfolio at the navigations above

❤ all inquiries should be forwarded to sabrinaclilian@gmail.com

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